today i realized what it means when people say
"it's easier to lie".
but its wrong to lie, especially to that one person.
and even if coming clean and telling the truth means that
they'll see you in a different light, hate you, or things become awkward,
i guess its just something that has to happen and something that you have to let happen when telling the truth at times.
cause being honest in a relationship is like the basis, and is one of the most important things.
even if it means making sacrifices.

the end.

hehe yesterday was cool :D jessica drove us all the way to south coast LOL
pretty smoooth ridE! xD hehe that was an adventure LOL
i gotta spend the whole day with babybooo :D lalala
CANT READ MY CANT READ MY POOOKERRR FACE.
hehe someones bored! x] lalalaalalala
im sleepy!! :[ i fell asleep in 3 periods todaaayyy.
how does someone get sooo freaking adorable?! idk BUT SHE IS. :] <3

really hating the rest of this year
school wise.

:]
guess whos going to prom?! hehehe me n my everythng are!!! :D <3
man i woulda liked someone to record it xD
heheheee cutie :]
so today i went to beach pracitce it was pretty cool hehe cept i couldnt wipe the water outta my eye cause he had to keep paddlign cause freaking ryan got it in my eye!
man what a workout. races are gna kill my arms LOL

wellas you all may have noticed... I MISS HER :]
lalala ima get to pay!!! some. LOL

HAHAHAHA TOTALLY SURPRISED :]
no heart attack no asthma attack! :D hehehe omg that was awesoime :D
LOL FREAKING COREY WAS LIKE NO IM SCARED . and im jsut like DUDE LETS START OMG THIS IS TAKING FOREVER LOL WHERE IS EVERYONE?! WHERE ARE THE FLOWERS?!
hehe but it went pretty welll despite ALOT OF SCREWUPs by me :[ :[
but im glad she liked it :D AND SEH SAID YES :] :] hehehe
gosh i loveher somucchhh :D she really has no idea how much! >:]
hehe today wawsss funn/funny :]

Happy 21 months baby girl :D I love you
I love you
I love youu sooo mucchhh :] always
through thick and thin, everything. and im always here for you baby! even on the toilet :]
hehehe
2 more months and its 2 years honey !! can you believe it?! like everything jhust went by so fast, just yesterday we were freshman! hehe but my how our love has grown hehe :]
its grown lots and still continues to grow EXPONENTIALLY!! (me=math nerd) hehehe im so funny :] I just wanted to tell you that
you mean the world to me and i really would be lost without you, your the frosting on my cupcakes! hehehe with cute sprinkles that spell out I (heart) YOU :]

and in this one moment
everything just came and crashed down on my head
its pushing me so far down
i dont know where i am anymore...

asdlaldsjfalslasdf

once again....

reality hurts. i am definitely just a dreamer.

lalala so i actually did SOME work in the afternoon today x] YAY :]
so like my feet are all dry from wearing sandals so much. it hurts -__-
lalla my butt hurts. NEEDS A MASSAGE !!!!! hehehe jk jk
im scaared but not scared of living
dont tell me im outta my leaaguee
i cant stop listening to her mix hehe
the songs are so good :] thanks again babyboo!!! :D

HAHA YOU ON FIRE

1. WERE YOU NAMED AFTER ANYONE?
no idea x]

2. WHEN WAS THE LAST TIME YOU CRIED?
dont recall

3. DO YOU LIKE YOUR HANDWRITING?
its unique :D

4. WHAT IS YOUR FAVORITE LUNCH MEAT?
SPAM jk idk x] roast beef!

5. DO YOU HAVE KIDS?
noopeee

6. IF YOU WERE ANOTHER PERSON, WOULD YOU BE FRIENDS WITH YOU?
MOST DEFINLITELY jk. im pretty boring x]

7. DO YOU USE SARCASM?
YEP.

8. DO YOU STILL HAVE YOUR TONSILS?
Yes.

9. WOULD YOU BUNGEE JUMP?
i think so :]

10. WHAT IS YOUR FAVORITE CEREAL?
i likeee cookie crisp :D idk i dont relal have a fav xD

11. DO YOU UNTIE YOUR SHOES WHEN YOU TAKE THEM OFF?
nope hehe

12. WHAT IS YOUR FAVORITE OUTDOOR ACTIVITY?
walking around n stuffs wwith her :]

13. WHAT IS YOUR FAVORITE ICE CREAM?
not sure hehe vanilla?

14. WHAT IS THE FIRST THING YOU NOTICE ABOUT PEOPLE?
mmmmm face?

15. Red or Pink?
reddd.

16. WHAT IS YOUR LEAST FAVORITE THING ABOUT YOURSELF?
fat!
stocky/short

17. WHO DO YOU MISS THE MOST?
my babygurrll

18. DO YOU WANT EVERYONE TO COMPLETE THIS LIST?
dont care

19. WHAT COLOR PANTS AND SHOES ARE YOU WEARING?
no shoes whtie pants

21. WHAT ARE YOU LISTENING TO RIGHT NOW?
Madcom - beggin

22. IF YOU WERE A CRAYON, WHAT COLOR WOULD YOU BE?
id be... like puke green

23. FAVORITE SMELLS?
baked goods LOL nice soaps, clean linen/laundry

24. WHO WAS THE LAST PERSON YOU TALKED TO ON THE PHONE?
my mom

25. DO YOU LIKE THE PERSON WHO SENT THIS TO YOU?
yes. love her to death :] <3

26. FAVORITE SPORTS TO WATCH?
mmm idk hehe

27. HAIR COLOR?
Dark Brown.

28. EYE COLOR?
dark bwon

29. DO YOU WEAR CONTACTS?
nopee

30. FAVORITE FOOD?
mm idk hehe

31. SCARY MOVIES OR HAPPY ENDINGS?
doesnt matter x]

32. LAST MOVIE YOU WATCHED?
mmm not sure

33. WHAT COLOR SHIRT ARE YOU WEARING?
pine greenish

34. SUMMER OR WINTER?
summer!.

35. HUGS OR KISSES?
combination!

37. MOST LIKELY TO RESPOND?


38. LEAST LIKELY TO RESPOND?


39. WHAT BOOK ARE YOU READING NOW?
huckleberry finn

40. WHAT IS ON YOUR MOUSE PAD?
no mouse pad

41. WHAT DID YOU WATCH ON TV LAST NIGHT?
i didnt watch tv yesterday

42. FAVORITE SOUND?
her sleepy voice HAHA ITS SO CUTE :] or when shes like NOOO or no no no!
dont do it! hehehehe so sosos cute socute

43. ROLLING STONES OR BEATLES?
beatles, dont listen to rollikng stones

44. WHERE IS THE FARTHEST YOU HAVE BEEN FROM HOME?
China

45. DO YOU HAVE A SPECIAL TALENT?
i do not

46 WHERE WERE YOU BORN?
Bellflower

47. WHOSE ANSWERS ARE YOU LOOKING FORWARD TO GETTING BACK?


48. HOW DID YOU MEET YOUR SPOUSE/SIGNIFICANT OTHER?
LOLL "HIIII IS YOUR NAME JEFFREY?"

What color is your underwear?
blue :] i checked just nao :D

Who are you going to marry?
a girl!


Have you ever been taken to the emergency room in an ambulance?
nooopee!



Do you find the opposite sex confusing?
somtimes xD


How many piercings do you have?
ALL OVER MY SEXY BODY.
jk


Do you have a friend of the opposite sex that you talk to 24/7?
i coulldd :] well shes more than a friend!



Do you believe that there are certain circumstances where cheating is okay?
uhhh idk LOL wat kinda cheating?



Do you want kids?
of course!



If someone liked you right now would you want them to tell you?
doesnt matter. but sorry cause im taken!!! and definitely in LOOOVEEEE :]



What woke you up this morning?
I HAVE NO IDEA



Have you ever slept on the floor with someone you liked?
uhhh not really LOL not sleep just maybe layed there if i recall correctly?




Who last called you baby?
my baby :D LOL HA!


When a friend walks out of your life, do you go after them or let them go?
idk haha



How long have you been best friends with your current best friend?
uhhh whos my bestfriend?



Last thing you touched, not computer-related?
my pants to check my boxesrs XD



Do you believe everyone deserves a second chance?
maybe depends




What color are your nails painted?
super hawtpink :] notrealyl you wish



Name something random that's to your left?
TISSUE BOX



Name something random that's to your right:
DEODORANT



Have you seen the music video for 'If I Were a Boy' by Beyonce?
nope


All the Disney shows now are crap, aren't they?
i havent watched disney shows in a while



If there was a pill that enlarged boobs and actually worked, would you spend $500 on it?
naahh ALL NATURAL HOMIEEE!! heheh x] gosh i probably sound so freakng gay right now LOL



If you found out a friend was smoking, what would you do?
eh w/e





When was the last time you had butterflies?
when she kissed me today :]



Do you have any plans for tomorrow?
school.


What do you currently hear right now?
the hum of the compooter


Who last made you laugh and why?
my baby and her crazy story at dinner LOL.



Where will you be in an hour?
at home



Who was the first person you talked to today?
my mom



Do you miss anyone?
definitely!!!

Did you ever see the movie Pearl Harbor?
i saw like 10 minutes



Who was the last person you rode in a car with?
mom and bro



What are you looking forward to in the next month?
SPRING BREAAKKK


Are you wearing jeans right now?
nopeee.



What's something you do when you're mad?
im quieter

Are you happy?
mmm i guess x]



What is the most random object around you?
guitar cables



Where is the next far off place you will travel?
dunno x]


Who was the last person or people you ate with?
my family



What was the last beverage you spilled on yourself?
idk water probably x]


What's a happy time you've had in the past week?
hanging out with my girlfriend ! :]




Do you like meeting new people?
sometimes


What was the first thing you thought this morning?
what time is it?


How's your heart lately?
clogged.



How do you feel about school?
sigh



What was the last movie or show you watched?
reno 911


What's bothering you?
my tailbone ?



Has today been a good day?
it was okayy



When's your birthday?
june 2nd


Have you ever woken up next to someone and were freaked out?
i dont think so x]



Are you looking forward to anything?
mm yep ;]


Do you usually have weird dreams?
nope


Do you like your bed?
eh it could be softer but its a bed and when youre tired its extra comfy :]



What color is your keyboard?
black




Who are you very disappointed in right now?
a friend


Have you ever worn the opposite sex's clothing?
umm not sure i think kinda? if that bra counted LOL



How long does it take you to shower?
15-20 mintes



Is the last person you hugged older than you?
nope !


Has anyone gotten on your nerves lately?
yeeepp.



Last night, did you fall asleep smiling?
i dont even remember LOL

Have you lived in a big city?
noopeee



Is a best friend, boyfriend, girlfriend or ex pissing you off at the moment?
nope



Do you think someone has feelings for you?
i know she does! :] but shes probably gna be liek NOO i hate you!!
i love you too baby :]



Where did you last fall asleep other than your bed?
in class?



Do you enjoy late night phone conversations?
with her yes :]



What's the last thing you drank?
water !

blog update #1230913

thats not the real number i just felt like putting that there LOL hehe im so funny x]
jk jk
welllll IM TIREEEDDD :[
lalala did you knoww?!


THAT I MISS HER SO MUCH!? well, cause i do :]
so like my sister went on a cruise today
i wanna go on another cruiisee! and take my baby wif me :]and relax and all tat good stuffs!
man my voiicee i cant sing properly cause im kinda sicckk :[
i was trying to today but it just couldnt get the full of it :[
you're a showw stoppperrr

Name Four Thing​s That You Wish You Had:
good looks
a drivers license
great smile
all the thing that she would like to see in a guy

Name Four Scent​s You Love:​
Her (stalkerish much) LOL
my soap
clean linen
rain

Name Four Thing​s You Did Today​:​
eat, read, sleep, play guitar

What is your curre​nt relat​ionsh​ip statu​s?​
taken and luvvinn it!

What is your sexua​l orien​tatio​n?​
straight DUH :]

What sort of peopl​e do you like,​ as far as what their​ inter​ests are in life?​
pretty much anything but drugs and sex

What physi​cal trait​s do you look for in a poten​tial inter​est?​
nice body, cute smile, cute! actually
why dont you just look at my gf :]

What kind of fashi​on-​sense​ attra​cts you?
LOl i ahve no idea x]

What kind of hair style​ do you find attra​ctive​ on a poten​tial mate?​
well i dont like those straight line bangs LOL

What trait​s turn you off?
uhh, drug dependence, being stuck up that kinda stuff

If you’​re singl​e right​ now, do you wish you were in a relat​ionsh​ip?​
in one!!

What are the posit​ive point​s about​ being​ singl​e?​
all i know right now if i was single, id just be missing her really bad.

What are the negat​ive point​s about​ being​ singl​e?​
being alone nd stuff thinking about everything

Do you miss your last sweet​ie?​
what last sweetie?

Do you think​ it’s bette​r to look for love or let it find you?
idk heh xD i think that even if you look for love itll still find you instead

Do you think​ coupl​es shoul​d spend​ a very large​ amoun​t of time together or space​ thing​s out a tad?
if you love spending time with each other then go for it! i love spending time with her :] always :D

When invol​ved with a perso​n,​ do you try to think​ about​ the here and now or do you often​ think​ of the futur​e?​
uhh idk? most of the time im just plain thinking of her

Do you have a crush​ right​ now? Do they know?​
nope

What’​s the longe​st perio​d of time you’​ve ever had a crush​?​
like a year or more

Have you ever confe​ssed your feeli​ngs to a crush​?​
YEP June 26, 07 :] <3

Do you tell a lot of peopl​e when you have a crush​?​
not really

Has someo​ne who had a crush​ on you ever confe​ssed to you?
noopeee

How big of an issue​ to you is your mate’​s ethni​city?​
nothing realy

In a poten​tial mate,​ how impor​tant is a sense​ of humor​ to you?
tres bon!

What makes​ your heart​ flutt​er and bring​s a big chees​y smile​ to your face?​
pretty much everything seh does LOl cause its all cute :D :D

What part of a perso​n’​s body do you find most attra​ctive​?​
mmm eyes? face? idk hehe

What’​s the first​ thing​ you look at when you look at someo​ne you’​re attra​cted to?
her boobs. HAHAHA JK JK
face?

Do you belie​ve in love?​
very much so! :D

Do you belie​ve in love at first​ sight​?​
noooo

How do you feel about​ marri​age?​
in the future

Do you plan on havin​g child​ren somed​ay?​
yesss

Have you ever had your heart​ broke​n?​
mm i dont think so, like not really

Have you ever had an emoti​onal pain so bad it made you sick or physically​ hurt?​
kinda

Do you belie​ve there​’​s hope for peopl​e after​ they get back toget​her or do you think​ the same probl​ems that cause​d the initi​al break​ up will resur​face?
i think there's hope, as long as the feelings are strong.

today was so... idk...
things just felt outta place...

and like this morning, it was like the first time where i woke up
and i felt this emptiness. like when i woke up i just kept wanting her to be there sleeping next to me, or wake up next to her smiling face you know?
like idk how to explain this feeling

wooshshhshs
i wish i had the talent to write a musical LOL
thatd be pretty awesome x] likee in the middle of classes get people to participate and plan it out
so a musical just starts outta nowhere LOL
wellyeah
today was once again super special :]
i feel EVEN CLOSER than last week :D and the week before!
like how could anyone get EVEN CLOSER! well i say taht all the time but seriously WE KEEP GETTING CLOSER! hehe i love you baby :] you is my everyfing :D hehehe
CHAIRS.

i am on ze floor updating parce que my tummy hurts >< its like grumbling like mad like
not hungry.
i wish i coulda seen their "wimpy" x] or coulda helped them on it! even though the additoin of moi probably wouldnta been much but just soo omuch more fun! HAHA jk jk x] im pretty lame.
so like... today at the park.... LOL
hehhee. :] and then in jessica's car too LOL
CHAIRS CHAIRS CHAIRS TABLES LEAVES TREE. LOL
just cause its so easy for me HAHA. x]
dayum she's amazing HAHA. shes got a power over me! xD in a way LOL
(psst, im not "chair cHIARS CHAIRS" right now )
i lloove you baby :]

so like i have a problem with my butt/tailbone area. frekaing pops and hurts when i tighten my ass i guess.
man im so tired >< i havent really slept in a while. idk why i just cant sleep long on weekends either.
im listening to Mae right now and holy crap it reminds me of summer too -__-
i need a doctor ><

looks like im not sleeping much again tonight :/

long day today.
asdlfkjasf.ljlk
i just wanna sleep for the rest of the week.

Are you afrai​d of losin​g the perso​n you like right​ now?
very afraid :/


What'​​​s one thing​ you do when you'​​​re mad?
sit there. thinking.


How'​​​s your mood?​​​
tired, exhuasted, frustrated at certain things.

When'​​​s the next time you'​​​ll see your close​st frien​d?​​​
uhhh tomrrow i guess.


Who is on your mind?
the only girl that would be! baby :]

Have you learn​ed any lesso​ns in life?​​​
who hasn?

Would​ you forgi​ve a frien​d for telli​ng your bigge​st secre​t?​​​
uhh i guess

Where​ did you get the pants​ you'​​​re weari​ng?​​​
kohls sucka!


When was the last time you had butte​rflie​s in your stoma​ch?​​​
whenever she gives me kisses and hugs :] whenever she makes me smile :D

Where​ were you last night​?​​​
at home.


Is there​ someo​ne that makes​ you happy​ every​ time you speak​ with them?
definitely.


Have you lost a best frien​d in the past year?​​​
uhhh

Is there​ somet​hing you'​​​re looki​ng forwa​rd to this month​?​​​
this month?
not htat i can think of

What are you doing​ right​ now?
sitting

Who is the first​ perso​n you think​ of when someo​ne asks you who you like?
well first, i think, "PFFT, like?! I LOVE HER (baby) :]

Have you ever liked​ someo​ne who all your frien​ds hate?​​​
nop

Confu​sed about​ anyth​ing?
eh

What'​​​s one thing​ you remem​ber about​ kinde​rgart​e​n?​​​​​​​
teh playground

Where​ do you want to go vacat​ion-​​​​​​​wise?​​​​​​​
europe

Do you prefe​r to call or text someo​ne?​​​
call

Do you know someo​ne who likes​ you?
not likee!

Do you have a secre​t that you aren'​​​t telli​ng anyon​e?​​​
nope, my biggest secret was - blank only she knows lOL

What is one of the meane​st thing​s you have done to someo​ne?
not sure

Is there​ someo​ne you would​n'​​​t mind kissi​ng right​ now?
yep :] starts with a C ends with an A (everything)


Have you ever liked​ someb​ody and never​ told them?​​
i think.


Do peopl​e ever think​ you'​​​re older​/​​​​​​​young​er than you actua​lly are?
not sure

Do you think​ boys truly​ under​stand​ girls​?​​
nope

Is there​ someo​ne you'​​​d wait forev​er for?
i think so

Do you ignor​e peopl​e when you'​​​re mad/​​​upset​ with them?​​​
i tend to

Is it easy to make you smile​?​​​
most of the time.


Are you start​ing to reali​ze anyth​ing?​
yeah

One thing​ you'​​​re looki​ng forwa​rd to?
spring break

Did you cry at all today​?​​​
nope.


Have your frien​ds ever rando​mly stopp​ed by your house​?​​​
nope never.


Do you like water​ parks​?​​​
yeah

If you could​ have somet​hing right​ now, what would​ it be?
time with her, like limitless time, alone with her :]

If you'​​​re being​ extre​mely quiet​ what does it mean?​​​
i am tired, sleepy, frustrated

Does anyon​e call you babe/baby?​​​
yes xD

Would​ you ever get a tatto​o?​​​
possibly

If you could​ cuddl​e with anyon​e right​ now, who would​ you pick?​​​
987

What was the first​ thing​ you thoug​ht this morni​ng?​​​
uhhhhhh wtf time is it

When was the last time you and an oppos​ite sex hugge​d?​​​
todai

Do you have a best frien​d to lean on?
eh

Who will you be with Satur​day night​?​​​
no one at the moment

Which​ is bette​r sunri​se or sunse​t?​​​
sunrise, its more rare

Tell me what'​s on your mind:
something just got in my eye LOL

Have you heard​ a song that remin​ds you of someo​ne today​?​​​
YEP.

Shes the only reason i keep going.
the reason i open my eyes, cause i need to see her, her beauty, her cuteness
and i need to feel her love, her care, and her tenderness
she gives me something that just makes me feel so whole.

today, as i was driving home, i let out this huge sigh
my mom asks why i let out that big sigh
and there i was thinking: does she really think that i have nothing to sigh about?
is there a reason why i shouldnt feel the way i do?

i told her it was nothing.

Three Names I go by

1. Jeffrey
2. Jeff
3. Fatty, fatass, stuff she calls me by x]

Three Jobs I have had in my life

1. none
2.
3.

Three Places I have lived

1. Cerritos
2. Taipei
3. n/a

Three TV Shows that I watch

1. Scrubs
2. Bizarre Foods with Andrew Zimmerman
3. Morning news?

Three places I have visited

1. Taiwan
2. Japan
3. China


People who e-mail me regularly

1. college board
2. random colleges
3. key club

Three of my favorite foods

1. fries?
2. pizza
3. ice cream!

Things I am looking forward to

1. time with her!
2. time w/o my mom
3. driving

heheh today i went tricking with hok
and we played monkey seemonkey do/horse x]
and yeah he almost beat me LOL i think i got pretty lucky xD
daylight savings is awesmoe LOL at 6 there was still light out :]
soo our band hasnt practiced for a bit >< no ones contacted me heh
we needa soon though ><
i missed her lots today :[ didnt get to see her one bit! :[[[
ima go cry now LASJLDFJLASDJ
LOL idk im feeling pretty random right now heheheh and wth idk lol
cake.

good day chap.

maann math 2c is like -__-
i hate math LOL
lalala so like i cant believe we
bought IT today LOL HAHA
just grab and walk away
covered it with a bag of chips and my huck finn book HAHAH
and someone didnt wanna be with me! LOL jk jk
lalalala finally the schoolweek is over ><

im so tired of school. omg.
im so tired -__-. lol he has a mole x] sleeepyyy
this ginseng stuff better work LOL.
so like
i miss her :[ alot alot :[ its only been a few hours too
whereee iss my babbyy :[
idk why i choose to sleep so late even though sleeping earlier feels much better ><
man, i hate homework.
surfs up! :]
iwannagotothe beach :/

i feel like fucking shit.
why is it that i can't do anythign right?
why is it that i can't even end a day on even just a slightest bit good terms.
why is it that i cant wake up anymore feeling like the days gna be at least okay?

again this week isnt starting off too well for me. someone please.

idk its just always something about this one particular day of the week.
most of the time its really empty and lonely.
theres nothing to keep me occupied
minutes go by like hours. ugh.
always end up irritated or some other low feeling.

and i guess i did learn some things from appsych.
it gives me answers to some things going on in my head.

why am i so
stupid
stupid. stupid.
stupid.
stupid.
stupid.
stupid.
stupid.
stupid.